arguably

Snowboarding. Why did it show me snowboarding? Is AI getting the impression that I want to travel to far off places? With far off climates, and far off activities? I think it is doing all sorts of calculations, based on what vids I linger on, or like or share, or click, and using that to ramp up its suggestions toward the logical next step. It's certainly entertaining. Is it truly inspiring change or action? It depends. How much change am I prepared to undertake? IlIlIlIl. Those are capital I's (Idaho) and lowercase l's (long). There appears to be a subtle difference. It seems like someone could have made them more different.

I haven't written in the last few days, partly due to this AI business distracting and occupying too much of my free time. It is lulling me into feeling like I don't need self-care. It is caring for me already, after all. But it occurred to me that 5 minutes of earnest self-care is equivalent to hours upon hours of AI / algorithm based scrolling. And some algorithmic recommendations concur with that way of thinking. I think I am doing pretty well in terms of the algorithmic nose that I am leading. I don't guide it (consciously nor unconsciously) into too many dangerous or maladaptive areas. In a way it is a dance that we share together. But in the end I would like to be the leader. Even if I am just one man, without trillions of bytes of information at my disposal.

Today is Thursday. But what difference does that make, anyway? One of my aforementioned vids was of a person questioning the ratio of weekend to weekday days. That perhaps it could and should be reversed, with 5 weekend days and 2 weekdays. I seem to be being encouraged in that direction. No school for the kids. No work. Little structure. It's appealing, right? That appeal must be why I linger on those suggested videos. It's a beautiful fantasy. I am certainly at a point where I am trying to take some of my fantasies more seriously, as potential realities. I have been noticing that some of the cellists and superstars that used to seem so far removed from whom I envision myself to be, seem more like real, tangible, relatable people now. Not like people that are doing something outside the realm of human capability, or summiting impossible peaks of achievement. Maybe I'm seeing myself as free of the limits I have assumed were required to function in society.